This blog is about my story “Mouse” and the characters I created and how I came up with the idea for my story, in case those reading it are interested.


I guess somewhere in the back of my mind I always had a vague scene imprinted in my brain of a very strong domainating male character, played off against a shy quiet female and how she would deal with him. But finding a situation where this could occur was my sticking point.

Then I was watching a celebrity reality show a few years back, that included a brother and sister circus act.  I was intrigued that the sister was quite dominated by her brother who was also a bit of a male chauvinist, expecting his sister to cook and take care of him, and that he seemed suspicious of any friends she made outside the circus. He and his mother  insisted if she were to have a boyfriend or husband he would also have to come from a circus background

Thinking on it, suddenly the vague scene in my head came back  and it  started to grow into a story set in the circus.

So I started to do some research on the internet into circus folk, and found out because of the nature of the circus they did mostly keep themselves to themselves and their time was mostly spent keeping themselves up to Par for their performances, which took up most of their time, they didn’t really have much time to think or do anything else

I used this to base the mind set of my main characters on. Though I have taken dramatic license as an author, to make my characters a little more pragmatic and suspicious of outsiders, just to suit my story.  In real life I am sure the circus folk are probably a lot more open minded.

Up until this point, I noticed most of my stories tended to go towards the dramatic and  sometimes over sentimental espicially writing about romance.  So in my Mouse story seemed the perfect opportunity to hold back on that as my two main characters where quite the opposite and the idea of them falling in love with each other seemed unlikely in their minds.

This was also the first time I wrote in first person from my female character Melanie’s point of view, so we see it mostly through her eyes and her feelings. And although my grammer is not the best, I discovered it gave the story an even more personal feel.

In the end, I think it turned out pretty well, because I was trying to bring across it wasn’t only through the big dramatic hot sex scenes or gushing romance which could show the art of love and connection, but the little things were also important in this case.

That  just through certain a look,  or even a conversation, and holding someones’s hand, could have just as much impact on my character emotions. and bring about there suddenly viewing each other in a completely different manner.

So I delibertly held back from my usual sentimentality, making it about two people who found themselves in an awkward situation, and who realised they had to set aside their differences and personal views of each other,  to try and get on together, thus discovering it could be done, and that they had more in common than they realised.

So  in doing this, they  eventually found love and mutual respect for each other.


RICARDO –  I have to admit I had a great creative  challenge writing this character, mostly because I knew we would never really get to see his point of view, and only see him through Melanie’s eyes, and for most of the story he is portrayed as mean and menacing and cruel and everyone starts of hating him

The truth is I guess he is  very arrogant, self obsorbed and can have a mean streak, but I put that down to youtful arrogance, and the fact he is used to being treated as someone special by his family and peers.

But it is also down to his passion and commitment for the circus way of life and he fels deeply for these things, even if it is a little skewered. I guess that is one of his faults, but it can also be his strength if he is on your side.

He tends to have a very black and white view on the world around him, and there is no grey area. With him, it is all or nothing, and never any middle ground.

When he feels passionatly about something he will defend it to the hilt, and has really no time for those who don’t share his point of view, which is what created the gulf between himself and my main female Character Melanie.

He thinks very highly of her Grandfather, and he is fiercly loyal to him, which  is why he is probably unfairly biased towards Melanie, because of her mother deciding to abandon the circus and causing a lot of heartache and disapointment to her family.

Also the fact that at first he just see’s her as someone of no signifigance because of her quiet shy manner, so completely different to himself

I tried to bring this point out about him, that even though Melanie didnt want to be around him, she  recongised his loyalty and his passion for those he was close to, and the circus, which made him the way he was.

Which was why after the car accident which left him crippled, and they realise they are going to have to get along now they also have a child on the way Ricardo decides with the same pragmatic view he will start being a good husband and a father.  Even if he is not in love with her,  he  becomes totally loyal to Melanie and their marriage, doing all he can to make it work.. Which is why he tends to be the one reaching out to her, letting her know she can trust him.

In doing this, his blinkers are removed, and his earlier preconcieved view on Melanie changes. He starts to get to know and understand her better, and discovers she is not so pathetic after all, it’s just her strengths and commitments are expressed differently than his own.


MELANIE – As much as Ricardo is mean and arrogant and dislikable at times, MeLanie’s shy mousey ways can be a little irritating to, in that you just want her to stop running away too scared and stand up for herself, so I think in some ways people can perhaps understand Ricardo’s disdain for her, even though it is rather unfair in the way he treats her still

But her strengths lay in the fact she has a more empathetic  and caring view of those around her, in 6that she can understand her father’s reasons for giving her up to her grandfathers care, and even though her Grandfather made it difficult for her father to keep in touch in the end Meanie fully understood his reasons and didint think bad of him for it.

The reason behind her shyness was because of her Grandfather overprotectivness and that she always felt a little overwhelmed in the background of the circus where people tend to be extravagant and outgoing wanting the limelight in the circus ring, and she was none of these things, so didnt feel like she fitted in, so tended to hid and stay in the background preferring to go un noticed as much as possible

The reason why I introduced Paul into her life, was because I knew there had to be someone who would see these good traits in her and help give her the self confidence in herself that Ricardo wouldn’t

Suddenly she just wasn’t a quiet little mouse, but a person with feelings who under estimated her own self worth, and now dealing with the new challenges of being married to Ricardo, she finds her strengths and endurance to put up with her situation as best she can. Even though she doesn’t like being married to him,  she can see his sense of loyalty and passion for what he believes in, and acknowledges him occasionally for these, even if she is not getting any benefit from them, so I think I have made her very fairminded and honest.

In the end I knew it had to be something great that would give her the strength to stand up to Ricardo, and the fact she now had real family behind her, she could turn to.

And this would eventually define their relationship.

But even after this, her self doubt remains with her, which is why she is still very cautious around Ricardo even after they decide to make a go of things. and why he has to do most of the reaching out to win her confidence back, which he does eventually.  Then suddenly she comes to the realisation she can be happy with him and grow in her own strenths and confidence again whilst doing so.

Suddenly these two people with such opposite personalities, use their different strengths that worked against them at one time, now find it can also bring them together, and they find love.. which is the main gist of my story.